"Excuse me!"

Our language must be difficult for others to learn. The multiple meanings of words could be extremely confusing. Consider the phrase 'excuse me' for example.

One little girl uses these two words as a license to interrupt at any time, sort of a 'carte blanche' for annoyance. She assumes full control and attention of her intended audience any time she pleases by repeating the two words over and over until everyone is quiet and listening. The first time I witnessed this, I was amazed, watching particularly the response her parents would have to the rude interruption. I should have guessed that the only reason she would do this to her parents and their guests was because she had learned from experience that she was allowed to do it. The parents always stopped talking to their guests or asked their guests to stop for a moment to give their attention to the little girl.

Another use of the two words is a polite response when you accidentally bump into someone in the grocery store. 'Excuse me' is also an appropriate comment to make if you need to make your way around someone in a crowded room. Others use the phrase after an unexpected gastric eruption. Each of these three uses represent honest and sincere requests. But this is not always the case with the use of the word 'excuse'.

For example; if someone tells you that everyone who was invited to your birthday party 'had an excuse' for not coming…what might go through your mind? If you ever invited a large number of people to an event and asked them to R.S.V.P., then you have a more complete understanding of the definition of 'excuse'.

In the gospel of Luke, Jesus told a parable about an invitation with R.S.V.P., the invitation to the kingdom of God…and the response people will have:

When one of those at the table with him heard this, he said to Jesus, "Blessed is the man who will eat at the feast in the kingdom of God." Jesus replied: "A certain man was preparing a great banquet and invited many guests. At the time of the banquet he sent his servant to tell those who had been invited, 'Come, for everything is now ready.' "But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said, 'I have just bought a field, and I must go and see it. Please excuse me.' "Another said, 'I have just bought five yoke of oxen, and I'm on my way to try them out. Please excuse me.' "Still another said, 'I just got married, so I can't come.' "The servant came back and reported this to his master. Then the owner of the house became angry and ordered his servant, 'Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind and the lame.' "'Sir,' the servant said, 'what you ordered has been done, but there is still room.' "Then the master told his servant, 'Go out to the roads and country lanes and make them come in, so that my house will be full. I tell you, not one of those men who were invited will get a taste of my banquet.'"

In his exposition on the passage in Luke, George Arthur Buttrick offers interesting comments.* On the truthfulness of our excuses he said:

Our social amenities are tagged with white lies. "Mr. and Mrs. So-and-so request the honor of your company…": the honor is not always deeply felt. Mr. and Mrs. Thus-and-thus regret that…": the regret does not always shake them with sobs. The word excuse is derived from ex causa: free from the charge; i.e., we know we are chargeable with some failure, so we present fictitious evidence by which we hope to win acquittal.

On the invitation to God's banquet he comments:

We "regret" because we fear the banquet may be dull. Our own affairs promise much more happiness, we think… The wealth of a farm, the power of five oxen, the excitement of marriage were all vital concerns; but the voice of God could wait...earth is hard fact, while heaven is only a hope; and God hardly stands a chance alongside investments, a car, or a wedding. Why has God set himself at such a disadvantage? Is it that Love would rather wait than coerce?

On why we fear the banquet may be dull, he said:

The excuses are flimsy, but the "servant" may not be blameless: the church has often presented God's invitation in a dull way to make the banquet seem dull, or even in a minatory (threatening) way to make the banquet seem a threat. (But) Excuses do not long stand.

On the invitation:

The invitation is always offered. Every man is writing his answer to the divine call. It is either, "Please present my regrets," which is but another way of saying, "My own business and home are much more important"; or it is, 'Weary with my sins, pleading no merit except thy welcome, I come."

You are invited to God's banquet. Are you planning to attend…or ask to be excused by a dumb ox?

*The Interpreter's Bible, Vol. VIII. Luke 14:16-24.

A few years ago, I walked out of an elevator into a crowded lobby and ran face-to-face into a friend from college that I had not seen in years. Instantly, we both called out each other's names, began laughing and slapping each other on the shoulder and for the next hour recounted story after story of our past experiences. Finally, we got around to our careers. He went first-then me. When he realized my job had something to do with God, he got the 'deer-in-the-headlights' look in his eyes and I sensed that I was headed for his O.T.D.E. (Off The Deep End) group of people who go from normal to fanatic in life. He confirmed it as he went on to tell me that his old roommate, Bob, shaved his head, gave everything he owned to some religious group in exchange for a white robe and began selling roses at the airport. I was now in his O.T.D.E. group alongside Bob! Did I get upset? I probably would have if I hadn't understood why he did this. You see, I have a tendency to do the same thing.

Why do we put people in the O.T.D.E. category? Because that is where many belong. The category was created for religious zealots who became overly-righteous. Unfortunately, it causes many to hesitate to talk to others about their faith in God for fear they will be put in a category with a bunch of religious fanatics.

Enough about what people think: what does God say? Is it possible to be 'too righteous'? Some people may be surprised to know what Scripture says about this. In the seventh chapter of Ecclesiastes we read; Do not be overrighteous, neither be overwise-- why destroy yourself? Do not be overwicked, and do not be a fool-- why die before your time? It is good to grasp the one and not let go of the other. The man who fears God will avoid all extremes. (Ecclesiastes 7:16-18 NIV)

God doesn't say it is wrong to go 'off the deep end', just that you will destroy yourself. Another caution is to be careful whose standards of righteousness we try to live up to. People who are not followers of Jesus Christ would still concede that He was a righteous man. Even so, Jesus didn't measure up to some of the standards set by the religious leaders of His day. He commented on this in Matthew's gospel: "' For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, 'He has a demon.' The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, 'Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and "sinners."." (Matthew 11:18-19 NIV)

He said that overrighteous people who measure everyone else's righteousness against their own would never be satisfied. John was more righteous than they, so they said he was crazy: They accused Jesus-the most righteous man alive-of being a gluttonous drunk! Six chapters earlier Jesus said the Pharisees-the most righteous religious leaders of that day-would never have enough self-generated and self-regulated righteousness to reach heaven. For I tell you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the Pharisees and the teachers of the law, you will certainly not enter the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 5:20 NIV)

How can we have enough righteousness to meet God's standards without going off the deep end and becoming 'overrighteous'? The answer is not 'how much', but 'what kind'. "Be careful not to do your 'acts of righteousness' before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. (Matthew 6:1 NIV)

First, drop the human righteousness…the idea of comparing your righteousness to others and demonstrating how righteous you are. They will simply say you're off the deep end. According to God, showing others how good we are is not His definition of righteousness. We obtain the right kind a different way. A few verses later we read: But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:33 NIV)

We don't earn righteousness by being better than everyone-or anyone-else. We ask God for it and accept it as a gift. Then, we learn to regard others and their righteousness from the proper perspective: "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye. (Matthew 7:1-5 NIV)

The Apostle Paul hit the nail on the head when he told the church in Greece: We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise. (2 Corinthians 10:12 NIV)

So! How can we keep people from putting us in the O.T.D.E. category because of our faith in God? We can't. But, we can endeavor to 'avoid all extremes' and do our part to deal a fatal blow to the O.T.D.E legend. And…don't get caught up in measuring the righteousness of others. You might become really good at it and make Mr. Flynt jealous.